In the Duldrums (or "is it okay that life is boring sometimes?")

I doubt I will ever be a popular mainstream artist whose work is pored over or dearly loved by millions. And that's mostly because my natural instincts and the things I want to explore run counter to what is conventionally believed to be cool or entertaining. What I want to see and read, and by extension write about are the mundane things, the beats in between the exciting moments. But that's no way to get famous.

Imagine a James Bond film that has Bond sitting on the phone for over an hour making repeat phone calls to his bank because he can't get his online bank account working no matter how many times he CORRECTLY puts in his code it doesn't go through, and every time he hits the "forgot your password" button it just redirects him to a page that says "sorry, error," and then frustrated he hits his key pad repeatedly and still gets nowhere. Or we find Bond on the way to the restroom for what he is sure is a quick trip that turns into a marathon of work and now he goes through regret for not bringing a book or something to pass the time. Or maybe he stands in the restroom shaving, making faces in the mirror when he nicks his neck and bleeds for what feels like hours and all he can do is stand there holding a piece of tissue to his neck, then he pulls it away, sees a fresh stream of blood, exhales deeply then returns the tissue and taps his toes waiting another few minutes. And he does this over and over again.

How about reading a comic book where Superman finds himself in a sweltering mid August heat wave and now is embarrassed to take off his outer clothing and reveal his Superman costume because he's sweat right through it and he's not entirely confident about how he might smell once he's removed his sportcoat.

Or how about reading a version of a Stephen King novel where the main character knows he has monsters from his childhood returning from the grave he locked them in thirty years ago, but he can't go outside without a quick clean up so he goes to brush his teeth and when he spits out the toothpaste residue finds some blood in it. Now he's a little paranoid because he's in between dental insurances and wants to try to find out if this is a big deal or not so he searches his mouth to find the small contusion but can't find it so he goes looking around the house for a small enough flashlight to help him see inside his own mouth and can't find one. Then he finally does but the stupid thing in out of batteries, so he goes searching again through the house for some triple A batteries, swearing that he saw some when he was looking for the flashlight but now he can't remember where and he's kicking himself for not doing a better job being organized and hears his mom's voice in his head from the last time she was over and took the blame on herself that her forty year old son couldn't do a better job of taking care of his own home.

None of these things would have any impact on the story at all. But they happen to normal people, they should happen to these characters too. But they don't and I think that's ridiculous! Why should their lives get to be edited and shaped so that everything adds up to everything else and nothing is mundane or trite. That's what life is most of the time and that's the reason - more than the flying, or coming from distant planets, or super strength, or having incredible weapons and licenses (lincenci? licencees?) to kill, or battling childhood demons - makes these stories fictional.

Life is not nearly as exciting as it is in the movies or books, or even in the Scriptures. Sometimes life is just mundane and we have to learn to serve Christ and be faithful in those little moments. Which is anything but easy. In the historical books of Scripture we are told about key events with allusions to bits of time (where nothing happens) that pass right through. But if you're reading Scripture like I do you can pass over those allusions rather easily. When you do that you get the impression these events are happening in rapid succession without a pause to breathe. That's why Biblical study, commentaries, charts, etc. can be so helpful: they can save us from these mistakes. Take for example the life of Paul, with a timeline that can be found right here. When reading the story we get the important events: he is a young scholar who is present and approving of the murdering of Stephen, he wants to kill Christians in Damascus, Jesus appears to him and knocks him off his horse, he converts, he is brought before the elders in Jerusalem and approved for work, he gets persecuted, he escapes, he goes on one missionary journey, he goes on a second missionary journey, he goes on a third missionary journey (in those journeys there are shipwrecks, persecutions, miracles, sermons, imprisonments, etc.), then he is martyred.

The story comes at you hard and fast because it is hitting on all the main historical and theological notes that are relevant which leaves no room for stuff like how he got along with his mother, or what he liked to drink, or how good he was at tennis or whatever other mundane information we don't need to know but comprised his life experience.

I'm not saying the Bible is incomplete because it doesn't have these details, like I said these stories have a very specific reason for being there, and since the Bible has all we need for life and Godliness there is nothing that can be added to it that could benefit us more. What I am saying is that when we speed read through the historical books of Scripture we get the wrong impression that life was excitement 24/7, which it wasn't. Although it has to be speculation because I don't have any written account to verify it I have to believe - because he was human - that Paul was bored at times, that he had no idea where his life was heading or what it would amount to.

Take for example the beginning of his story in Acts. He is consumed with zeal for his faith and as a result seeks to destroy those who insult it - Christians. He oversees the death of the first martyr and then convinces the Sanhedrin to allow him to round of Christians in Damascus. He is noteworthy for his energy and zeal. Its doubted that anyone could match Paul for his hate for Christians and all that they represent, and the passion that sprang from that hate. Then he is converted through Christ revealing Himself to him. Paul is struck blind and must find comfort among Christians. Then he spends three years (!) be discipled and doing nothing for the ministry. A guy with that much passion, that much excitement, pushed to the sidelines to study and learn and be among Christians in order to be discipled. I can't imagine that time was always enjoyable. I can't imagine that Paul wasn't tapping his feet wanting to be out in the world doing the work of ministry. At this time the Church had been scattered and the Gospel was spreading through the known world. How could Paul not have been itching to be a part of that?

Finally he goes to Jerusalem and there he preaches and then people try to kill him for his preaching. So he is sent to Tarsus (his home town) and lays low for another four years! Four years!!! All while the Church is spreading, growing, and maturing, and the guy who is destined to be the most important figure in the early Church period (well... the entire Church period) sits to the side waiting. Then finally Barnabas calls him to help minister to the church in Antioch. Then he is off and running (more or less) until the Lord takes him home.

There is comfort for me in going over this time line today. I like knowing that the most important figure since the advent of the Church spent a number of years on the sidelines. I know he was studying, learning more about his Messiah. But he was also just living life, going through all the boring details we go through and presumably wondering when would be his turn on the front lines.

The time does come. Our duty, as was Paul's, is to remain faithful until we are called up. Until then we must remain forever vigilant, so that such a time does not pass us by. And enjoy the small moments until we get there, even if they are not nearly as cinematic as we might hope.

Thank You Peewee Herman (or "the new movie that i will be forcing loved one's to watch with me")

How could I have known as a kid that I was living in the tail end of the golden years of children's television? There was no real way of assessing that as I lacked any concept of history or the future, and my ability to think abstractly was nil. Even though I wasn't aware of it I don't think I appreciated it any less. I consumed it hand over fist. Ninja Turtles, Thundercats, Heman, GI JOE, Peewee Herman, Mr. Roger's Neighborhood, Fraggle Rock, Gummy Bears. I loved it all dearly.

I wasn't old enough to catch most of it in its original run so I relied a lot on syndication, but how was I to know the difference? These shows burrowed into my subconscious and helped me to develop the imagination I have today.

Some shows I have vivid memories of, even though its been some twenty years since I have seen them, others I only have bits and pieces. Those bits and pieces are funny things, because I'm not at all aware of them until I'm faced with the collective whole once again.

When I was working to build a youth program at my church my vision was to follow my personality more than the standard formula most youth groups fall into (hangout time/game, worship, message, everyone goes home happy). I wanted it to feel organic, with the fun and seriousness mixed in together so that you didn't know where one ended and the other began. There would be worship, prayer, games, and a message but also skits and weird characters who's business being in a setting like that might seem strange to anyone who wasn't there week in and week out. I took a cast of characters I had worked on and placed them in ridiculous sketches or had them teach on something (perhaps the Greek alphabet) so that students were getting information while also (one hopes...) laughing.

One of the characters I used was from a five minute play I wrote in high school for a competition. His name was ADD Boy, a character so loaded with energy it could hardly be contained, who's relentless optimism overshadowed everything around him. He was loud, obnoxious, and... ridiculous. But the kids seemed to enjoy him. He yelled when he shouldn't, smiled without end, laughed uncontrollably, and seemed entirely incapable of tolerating anything boring. I liked him. And I thought he was entirely original, a creature built by me.

But I was wrong. I did little skits as that character (and even some videos that had me, as myself, interacting with ADD Boy) for nearly two years and stopped as I stopped running the youth program.

That's when I found Peewee's Big Adventure on DVD for only five dollars. As a Tim Burton fan (except for Alice in Wonderland, which made my soul ache) and a thrifty movie shopper I was morally obligated to buy it, so I did. I took it home that night and cried laughing during the opening sequence (the plan was the eat whilest watching, a plan that was quickly set aside until about ten minutes into the movie when Peewee finally left his house). While I was beside myself enjoying every second I realized something: I completely ripped off Peewee Herman every second I was ever acting as ADD Boy. He is an exact replica, only lacking the cool suit and bow tie (If only i had those...).

There are only bits and pieces of Peewee's Playhouse and -Big Adventure floating around in my head. I remember a talking chair, a sailor type character, a cool red bike with a lion on the front, the claymation Penny, and Peewee's laugh, but that's about it. I hadn't watched anything Peewee related since kindergarten and ... well... his legal troubles. I have no active memory of the character or the show, but apparently the character burrowed its way into my brain and stayed there for some twenty years, because the second I pretended to be this character he came screaming out.

Its funny how things like that can work. I blatantly ripped off the man's work without even being aware I was pulling from it. Which I hope is a compliment to the world of Peewee Herman (even if Paul Ruben himself isn't the man most fitting of a compliment-this I cannot say with certainty either way*) that he affected me in this way.

Now revisiting the movie (and hopefully if I can get my hands on it-the show) there is so much to love about it's whole world, but mostly Peewee himself. Every second he's on screen, whether in his protective, insulated world, or out among murders, bikers, cowboys, and ghosts makes me laugh.

I love and long for his relentless optimism. There is a part of me that wishes for that childlike wonder he possessed-jumping on his bed the second he woke up, playing with ridiculous toys, making faces in the mirror (especially the tape bit), talking to his breakfast, and constantly laughing at himself all the way through. The thing I think I enjoy the most is his look of ever-tempered joy that fills his whole body as he takes in the world around him. He looks like he is going to explode with delight at any moment. He's not ironically joyful, he's simply joyful. And him enjoying the world around him is a joy for me. The potential to make anything fun, even brushing one's teeth, is something that I lose at times, especially when I am with other people. Peewee Herman, in it's silly way, reminds me of it.

Peewee's Big Adventure is now my official feel good movie, the one I'll throw on any time I'm in need of a quick, but well deserved, laugh. This week it served that very function and I can't express my appreciate for that enough, for ninety minutes of uninhibited silliness. And for only five dollars? What a steal!

*but his part in Buffy The Vampire Slayer was pretty great too!